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PART SIXTY-FOUR
[Previous Part] [Beginning]
“What the fuck is that shit?!”
“The more important question is how?” Thalien cut in, staring at me in utter disbelief. “You’re well aware of what chain-lightning looks like.”
“But it’s not supposed to do that hand-to-hand bullshit,” Shay-Lee argued. “That shit goes from hand to whatever the fuck you want dead.” As she spoke, she pointed to her palm and flicked her finger outwards at an imaginary target. “Not bouncing between your fucking hands like a goddess-damned rubber ball in motion!”
“It’s the Acropolis,” Lanna said, and although her tone was to answer her husband, her expression asked me to confirm it and fill in the specifics.
“No, it’s me actually. But I’m more than just doing it. I see the source of the magic,” I explained. “It’s floating in the air all the time, like specks of dust, waiting to do whatever the mage or sorcerer requests of them.”
“That’s why you asked me what I saw,” Thalien said thoughtfully.
I nodded. “I wondered if all mages saw it like that, but you said no. Emphatically no,” I reminded him. “From what you said, you merely gesture or speak, and the magic happens … which is true for a given definition.”
“What do these dust dots look like?”
“As I explained to Tarq, they’re like a pinhole-sized dot, not unlike the grains of the Acropolis key, only smaller. Much, much smaller. And just like the key grains, they connect to others to create different patterns, like a deck of cards. If you divide it into four, you have the houses. If you only want the sevens, only four stick together. On their sides, they’re three inches long and barely visible. From above, they become two inches. Just by that explanation alone, the combinations are endless, but when you’re really describing something that can change shape like we’ve seen the key do, there are no limits to their capabilities.”
I gestured to my hand. “When Milo healed this, I watched the dust dots gather along the injury and pull it back together, somehow fusing the two sides to make it whole.”
“And how long have you known this?”
“Since the night we got to Tetorli. I scryed Polly by myself on that lookout and asked her how many other Shadow Emperors wielded the power that had been bestowed on me.”
“And you screamed most emphatically, ‘none’,” Milo said on my behalf. I nodded again resolutely.
“So what exactly are your limitations, magically speaking?” Lanna asked.
“I’m not sure I have any. Not only that, but I don’t need to incant or gesture or have ingredients to make things happen. I’m directly … linked … to the magic via this.” I rubbed my left shoulder.
“And Harmony already said that thing probably can’t be neutralised, even if it was cut off you…” Shay-Lee commented, scowling at my shoulder like it was the source of all her problems. In her head, it probably was.
“Those two days I was unconscious, it wasn’t because of the cold. Or at least, not totally,” I amended, because falling over half-frozen had undoubtedly been part of the issue at the time. “This…” —I rubbed my shoulder— “…is now everywhere. I felt it spread out inside me. Bonding with me. Honestly, I don’t think the brand itself matters anymore, except to let the people know who I am.” My hand moved to the back of my neck and up to scratch across the top of my scalp, indicating it had somehow travelled into my head … and through my limbs, all the way to my toes. “I’m not going to try and do anything I haven’t seen done or can’t envision happening because that is a disastrous line of thought.”
“What other things can you do, Uncle Em?”
I wasn’t interested in doing a show-and-tell, but if a couple more examples were enough to keep them happy, I stuck with the ones I knew. Curling my right hand into a cup, I formed a snowball-sized fireball. Ironically, I didn’t feel the heat because more dots had lined my hand like a protective glove.
It was amazing how much I had folded into the word ‘magic’ when common sense was right there in front of me. Fire was fire, and when it was said aloud, magic fire that didn’t burn the caster was just stupid.
I heard a gasp that was not part of our party and clenched my fist to extinguish it as everyone swung towards the sound. With a wall of trees at our back and Felipe and Gimweren’s people in front and on either side of us settling in for the night, there was no reason for anyone to be back there. At least, I had assumed so, given I’d put up a sound blister to keep this conversation private.
That meant our observer was right up against the protective barrier, just as Felipe had been last night. Except no one was there. It wasn’t snowing so hard that we couldn’t see three feet into the darkness, but by the time we snatched up our weapons and reached the protective wall, our visitor was long gone.
A dwarf couldn’t move that quietly, nor could they do so without leaving a trail in the fresh powder, which made our unwanted visitor a snow half-orc. We’d be tracking one lone snow half-orc with countless numbers of them around us while it was snowing.
Oh, this is going to be fun … not.
Thalien dismissed the protective dome that would’ve dumped the better part of a foot of snow on top of our camp (not to mention ruin my meal prep) if I didn’t throw another one up six inches inside his. The difference being mine was more like a cave, complete with an opening we could all rush through.
Only Thalien seemed to notice. Or maybe he was the only one who truly understood what I’d done. Magic in his eyes was uncompromising. Specific gestures and specific words moved a specific number of dust dots into a specific formation that couldn’t be modified. In contrast, I mentally commanded the individual dust dots to form whatever pattern I saw fit, including a protective barrier with an open doorway.
“Milo,” I called, for we wouldn’t get very far if we didn’t know what direction to head.
Milo was already pushing past Tarq, searching the ground. He quickly surmised the same thing I had and held out his hand, palm down. I’d seen him do this trick dozens of times before, but with my new insight, I saw the dots gather into designated sections on the ground and condense into six-inch footprints that turned a pale blue for everyone to see.
“It’s a kid,” I said before Milo could make the announcement, tossing my weapons belt back inside the campsite (since I hadn’t buckled it into place yet) and charging after our pint-sized runaway—a snow half-orc. Felipe would have a fit if he knew one of the kids had followed us after all, though it did beg the question of how they’d evaded two hundred snow half-orc warriors plus however many Felipe had following us from the shadows.
The frantic pace of their footsteps … the way they bounced off a tree, went down onto one knee, and scrambled up to run once more was proof of their panic. I wouldn’t add to that fear by drawing a sword on him. Worst case, I still had a dagger and a zot-shot tucked into my boots.
Tarq and I ran at full speed, assuming we were leaving Milo and the others to trail behind us (except Thalien and Lanna, who almost always remained with the camp due to the amount of magical gear we all carried. That stuff was expensive).
However, it was times like this that I was forced to remember I was approaching sixty, and we had kids less than half my age with us. Liab charged between us on all fours, running half as fast as us again and in my peripheral vision, I caught sight of our resident half-elf thief converging through the snow on our right.
Less than a minute later, I heard the thump of someone impacting the snow, followed quickly by Liab’s sharp, breathy grunts of victory. As we ran up on the scene, Liab was sitting on the ground with one of his long arms around the shoulders of our runaway child, his other hand cupped securely over his mouth. He had the boy sitting on the ground before him with his legs hooked over the kid’s thighs to keep them secured.
Shay-Lee was kneeling beside them, her dagger out but folded back along her wrist and forearm. Any wrong move on the boy’s part would have that dagger finding a new sheath in his throat. To my surprise, Harmony was on the other side of Liab, rubbing her hand across the child’s head while her other hand pulled a blanket from the shoulder tote she was almost ever without. Another reminder that the younger women were faster than Tarq and me when they wanted to be. I made a mental note to lecture them both about taking unnecessary risks, given we still knew nothing about this child and how danger came in all forms. There was a reason Tarq and I went first, followed closely by Milo.
Straight away, something felt wrong. The child’s deflation as he realised there was no escape was to be expected, but something else was way off. Back at Tetorli, the kids were playful and curious, only to be chased by their elders with smirks and snowballs. More stringent discipline was sometimes necessary, but this boy’s reaction was another level of defeat.
If I had to hazard a guess, I’d say he was ten, maybe eleven. I declared him male since he only wore a loincloth, though truthfully, it was hard to tell at that age. I wasn’t a specialist in the age development of half-orcs.
Apart from the loincloth, something else that struck me as odd. As soon as he saw me, his gaze went to my covered wrists and then dropped to the ground between us. His shoulders also curled forward as much as Liab would let them. I got the distinct impression he would roll all the way forward with his brow to the ground if he were released, and that was definitely not the way of the snow half-orcs.
And then it hit me.
The boy’s head had been shaved, and very short white bristles, more common amongst my soldiers, barely penetrated his pale grey scalp. Even the youngest child at Tetorli wore their hair long with some manner of weight tied into the end to familiarise them with the handy weapon they’d use as they got older.
Which meant the boy wasn’t from Tetorli or any other native snow half-orc settlement… and we were less than a day’s march from Cerro Nexo, only hours from Jinis Ridge.
I really didn’t like the picture I was putting together in my head.
The poor kid trembled when I came forward, took the blanket hem and lifted it to cover his head … and stopped with a wordless gasp when I saw the back of his head had been branded with a series of letters and numbers that went all the way into his skull. It wasn’t a square brand and had been rolled across the contours to go from ear to ear. And it was old.
Fuck me.
My stomach fell into my feet, and I felt all the blood drain from my face.
“What the fuck is that?” Shay-Lee demanded, which galvanized me into moving.
I took complete control of the blanket from Harmony and quickly covered his upper body, telling her to grab out a second one. We wouldn’t get back to camp without being discovered, but I wanted to limit the spread of this knowledge. Our saving grace was the camp was in the middle of being set up, and most eyes were busy doing other things.
Regular half-orcs were known for fits of rage that would make them both deadly and loud, and I had no idea how the snow half-orcs, their intelligent brethren, would handle this. I needed to be smart. I needed my army to stay smart and not get swept up in blind fury. I needed to return this boy to our campsite and bring Felipe in on our discovery. I would also need to change the arrangement of my protective barrier to hide the chief’s reaction from his people, who would be watching.
To quote our thief … shit just got real.
Tarq took Shay-Lee’s place and slid his hands between the boy’s shoulders and Liab’s chest. “Sit still, lad,” he said quietly, then lifted him just enough from Liab that Harmony could wrap his lower half in the second blanket, completely hiding him from view. Cradled in Tarq’s large arms, the boy’s general shape would only come across as humanoid, including an adult dwarf or a young human, which was just what I’d hoped for. Harmony stayed at their side with her hand on the blanket near the boy’s head, her presence keeping him calm.
And to ensure we didn’t have any curious observers, the rest of us formed a loose, defensive circle around them, with me at the front and Milo in the rear, and we made our way back to the campsite.
I knew snow half-orcs preferred the cold of the elements, but in this instance, he would just have to deal with the human conditions. I modified the dome to give it a milky pigmentation that would blend in with the snow but not allow anyone else to spy on us; at the same time, I closed the opening to give us complete privacy. There was little doubt word would get back to Felipe, but I wanted to question the boy while ensuring he had something to eat before I brought in the snow half-orc chief. Felipe was going to be emotional enough as it was without making things worse.
“The fact that you can change its composition after the spell’s conclusion defies all logic,” Thalien said, lifting his eyes to the structure around us.
I understood how it looked from his viewpoint. Magic cast was then set in place. Another spell could replace it only if more powerful magic were cast or the original was dispelled. Whereas for me, it was a matter of having the amassed dust dots make a quarter turn to the left, no different than barking out the same command to an assembled army.
“This is not the norm,” I reminded him. “We’re presently at war, which has changed our dynamics temporarily. Very temporarily. Once we’re out the other side of this, should we be permitted to live with what we know, it will still be your job to create nightly cover when the weather turns against us and mine to cook dinner for you and Lanna. Just as it always has been.”
I wasn’t sure if he believed me; honestly, we had more pressing issues anyway. I had Shay-Lee gather up my comforter and ball it on the ground at the farthest point from the fire against the tree line, and I had Tarq deposit him on it while I fossicked through my bag for my canteen and some beef jerky that would give the kid a much-needed dose of protein.
The boy never moved as Harmony gently tugged the blanket from his head. “You’re safe now,” she crooned as his eyes met hers briefly, then jerked away to the floor. Unfortunately, when I stepped in front of him and squatted down, he gasped and curled into the tightest possible ball with his face pressed into his knees, covering his head with both hands (but not the brand, leading me to assume he’d been taught never to hide his identity) and proceeded to wet himself. The acrid stench meant he was severely dehydrated, but that too was the least of our worries.
I sighed and silently passed Harmony the food and the drink, then shuffled back a few feet without rising to give her room to work.
He’d been nervous around Harmony, but the sight of me terrified him. I sat on the ground beside the fire and crossed my legs, giving him time to settle. It amused me immensely to watch Lanna’s nose screw up as she approached them from Harmony’s side to not frighten the boy any more than he already was. With a few mumbled words, she cast her cleansing spell that took care of the comforter and the blankets (and knowing Lanna, the boy himself). Then, she moved around in front of the boy and knelt, leaning forward to peek through a gap in his arms. “What’s your name, honey?”
“SHO-8-1-4-3,” the boy barely whispered.
The same letter and number combination burned into his head—literally. I closed my eyes and breathed out slowly, refusing to call him that. My brain immediately started playing with the combination, shifting emphasis and accents. Until he selected a new name for himself, we needed to call him one that brushed up against his designation for the sake of familiarity but still sounded like a name. I opened my eyes and used a stick to write it out on the ground. By turning the 8 into a B, and the 1 into an I, it became …
“…Shobi,” I said, lifting my eyes to everyone. My friends were looking at me. The boy hadn’t moved. “SHO-8-1-4-3, from now on, we’ll call you Shobi. Nod if you understand.”
It made me sick to fall back on this mentality of barking orders at a frightened kid and watching his head wiggle forward and back under his hands, but soft words of comfort wouldn’t cut it. The boy would never believe them from me. I reminded him too much of what he had escaped from, and humans hadn’t been kind to him in that place. Augustus Morales, you need to survive long enough for me to get my hands on you. Then, and only then, will you be made to pay in full for all this.
“Alright, Shobi. I need you to eat the food and drink the water my friend is trying to give you, and to do that, you need to sit up. So, sit up.” I barely infused my words with command, but Shobi shot up so fast his head and shoulders knocked against Lanna and Harmony, who were both bowed over him, trying to coax him out. He still wouldn’t look at me, but he searched for the supplies, shoving the first jerky stick so far down his throat that he gagged.
Harmony tightened her grip on the rest and gently fed them to him in small, bite-sized pieces, intermittent with swigs of water. Thalien passed Lanna a short length of fabric which she wrapped around Shobi’s head like a bandana, covering his slave brand. He gasped and tensed, his hand reaching to drag the material away. Harmony did her patented shushing croon that took much of the fight from him. “It’s going to be okay, sweetie,” she whispered, feeding him another piece of jerky.
I watched their interaction, and knowing he was in safe hands, I twisted away from him and stood up to avoid frightening him. “Where are you going?” Tarq asked, also rising. I glanced over my shoulder to answer my friend but found the way the boy was staring at Tarq like he’d lost his mind much more interesting. It wasn’t hard to guess that he wasn’t used to an alternate race speaking that way to a human in authority.
“Word of our young friend would have reached Chief Felipe by now.” I used the honorific for the child’s sake, and sadly, he made no reaction to the title of his people’s leader. I wondered if he knew what chief even meant. “He might want to keep the boy close, or he might want to send him back to Tetorli with some of the fighters to keep him safe.”
“I’m coming with you.”
“Tarq …”
“You’re about to tell the snow half-orc chief that our enemies have been enslaving his people without his knowledge or yours long enough to have a man-child with no clue of his heritage. If you think I’m not going to stand between you and him while he rages, you have clearly forgotten who you’re dealing with.”
I raked my fingers through my short hair and sighed. “Very well.”
Unfortunately, Felipe took it about as well as I had expected.
* * *
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For more of my work including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF WE PLAN, GODS LAUGH TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!

I had my first real taste of DMT yesterday, took 2 fairly decent pulls of my vape I had one pull the day before but it only left me with a trippy headspace without visuals and feeling like I was on a low dose of shrooms but it still came on pretty hard, nowhere near the intensity of yesterday's trip though. I actually posted about it yesterday but was too bamboozled at the time to recall some of it.
So basically as soon as I exhaled the first hit things started "buzzing" then I took my second hit, exhaled and then the "buzzing" intensified then my vision began to take on a fish eye lens effect I could feel the universe closing in on me and my last thought was basically "oh shit here we go" I dropped the vape collapsed to my bed like a sack of potatoes closed my eyes and curled up into a ball as the experience seized me by the balls. I saw a bunch of colours and patterns and everything seemed to be flashing and moving really fast, I remember freaking out initially and I hyperfocused on my breathing thinking I was about to die, but eventually I began to submit to the experience, one of my last thoughts I remember having before going into ego death was trying to reassure myself "stay calm this will all be over in 15 minutes" while I did not see any entities (the visuals I was having were too chaotic to discern much of anything) I could definately feel the presence of entities with me and they almost seemed to be playing a good cop/bad cop routine. Some were basically tormenting me and trying to fuck with me but others were comforting me and soothing me and helping to guide me through the experience. Again as far as what I sae goes it was really just indescribable, far too chaotic to put into words but I can definately see where the "circus" vibe people refer to comes from, i've gotten that on high intensity mushroom trips too.
Eventually I opened my eyes breifly as I could feel it beginning to wear off but the room still looked really distorted so I closed them, then as the effects waned further I opened my eyes again and I was able to sit up, as I regained my speech the first words out of my mouth went something like "hoooooly SHIIIT!! jesus h fucking christ!! that was INSANE!!" I still felt very shaky and uncoordinated but as it wore off further I was finally able to stand up and make myself a cup of tea and grind up some weed.
I don't know if I broke through or not, I probably didn't but that was still one of the most intense psychedelic experiences I've ever had, especially the comeup and i'm a pretty seasoned psychedelic user.

PART SIXTY-FOUR
[Previous Part] [Beginning]
“What the fuck is that shit?!”
“The more important question is how?” Thalien cut in, staring at me in utter disbelief. “You’re well aware of what chain-lightning looks like.”
“But it’s not supposed to do that hand-to-hand bullshit,” Shay-Lee argued. “That shit goes from hand to whatever the fuck you want dead.” As she spoke, she pointed to her palm and flicked her finger outwards at an imaginary target. “Not bouncing between your fucking hands like a goddess-damned rubber ball in motion!”
“It’s the Acropolis,” Lanna said, and although her tone was to answer her husband, her expression asked me to confirm it and fill in the specifics.
“No, it’s me actually. But I’m more than just doing it. I see the source of the magic,” I explained. “It’s floating in the air all the time, like specks of dust, waiting to do whatever the mage or sorcerer requests of them.”
“That’s why you asked me what I saw,” Thalien said thoughtfully.
I nodded. “I wondered if all mages saw it like that, but you said no. Emphatically no,” I reminded him. “From what you said, you merely gesture or speak, and the magic happens … which is true for a given definition.”
“What do these dust dots look like?”
“As I explained to Tarq, they’re like a pinhole-sized dot, not unlike the grains of the Acropolis key, only smaller. Much, much smaller. And just like the key grains, they connect to others to create different patterns, like a deck of cards. If you divide it into four, you have the houses. If you only want the sevens, only four stick together. On their sides, they’re three inches long and barely visible. From above, they become two inches. Just by that explanation alone, the combinations are endless, but when you’re really describing something that can change shape like we’ve seen the key do, there are no limits to their capabilities.”
I gestured to my hand. “When Milo healed this, I watched the dust dots gather along the injury and pull it back together, somehow fusing the two sides to make it whole.”
“And how long have you known this?”
“Since the night we got to Tetorli. I scryed Polly by myself on that lookout and asked her how many other Shadow Emperors wielded the power that had been bestowed on me.”
“And you screamed most emphatically, ‘none’,” Milo said on my behalf. I nodded again resolutely.
“So what exactly are your limitations, magically speaking?” Lanna asked.
“I’m not sure I have any. Not only that, but I don’t need to incant or gesture or have ingredients to make things happen. I’m directly … linked … to the magic via this.” I rubbed my left shoulder.
“And Harmony already said that thing probably can’t be neutralised, even if it was cut off you…” Shay-Lee commented, scowling at my shoulder like it was the source of all her problems. In her head, it probably was.
“Those two days I was unconscious, it wasn’t because of the cold. Or at least, not totally,” I amended, because falling over half-frozen had undoubtedly been part of the issue at the time. “This…” —I rubbed my shoulder— “…is now everywhere. I felt it spread out inside me. Bonding with me. Honestly, I don’t think the brand itself matters anymore, except to let the people know who I am.” My hand moved to the back of my neck and up to scratch across the top of my scalp, indicating it had somehow travelled into my head … and through my limbs, all the way to my toes. “I’m not going to try and do anything I haven’t seen done or can’t envision happening because that is a disastrous line of thought.”
“What other things can you do, Uncle Em?”
I wasn’t interested in doing a show-and-tell, but if a couple more examples were enough to keep them happy, I stuck with the ones I knew. Curling my right hand into a cup, I formed a snowball-sized fireball. Ironically, I didn’t feel the heat because more dots had lined my hand like a protective glove.
It was amazing how much I had folded into the word ‘magic’ when common sense was right there in front of me. Fire was fire, and when it was said aloud, magic fire that didn’t burn the caster was just stupid.
I heard a gasp that was not part of our party and clenched my fist to extinguish it as everyone swung towards the sound. With a wall of trees at our back and Felipe and Gimweren’s people in front and on either side of us settling in for the night, there was no reason for anyone to be back there. At least, I had assumed so, given I’d put up a sound blister to keep this conversation private.
That meant our observer was right up against the protective barrier, just as Felipe had been last night. Except no one was there. It wasn’t snowing so hard that we couldn’t see three feet into the darkness, but by the time we snatched up our weapons and reached the protective wall, our visitor was long gone.
A dwarf couldn’t move that quietly, nor could they do so without leaving a trail in the fresh powder, which made our unwanted visitor a snow half-orc. We’d be tracking one lone snow half-orc with countless numbers of them around us while it was snowing.
Oh, this is going to be fun … not.
Thalien dismissed the protective dome that would’ve dumped the better part of a foot of snow on top of our camp (not to mention ruin my meal prep) if I didn’t throw another one up six inches inside his. The difference being mine was more like a cave, complete with an opening we could all rush through.
Only Thalien seemed to notice. Or maybe he was the only one who truly understood what I’d done. Magic in his eyes was uncompromising. Specific gestures and specific words moved a specific number of dust dots into a specific formation that couldn’t be modified. In contrast, I mentally commanded the individual dust dots to form whatever pattern I saw fit, including a protective barrier with an open doorway.
“Milo,” I called, for we wouldn’t get very far if we didn’t know what direction to head.
Milo was already pushing past Tarq, searching the ground. He quickly surmised the same thing I had and held out his hand, palm down. I’d seen him do this trick dozens of times before, but with my new insight, I saw the dots gather into designated sections on the ground and condense into six-inch footprints that turned a pale blue for everyone to see.
“It’s a kid,” I said before Milo could make the announcement, tossing my weapons belt back inside the campsite (since I hadn’t buckled it into place yet) and charging after our pint-sized runaway—a snow half-orc. Felipe would have a fit if he knew one of the kids had followed us after all, though it did beg the question of how they’d evaded two hundred snow half-orc warriors plus however many Felipe had following us from the shadows.
The frantic pace of their footsteps … the way they bounced off a tree, went down onto one knee, and scrambled up to run once more was proof of their panic. I wouldn’t add to that fear by drawing a sword on him. Worst case, I still had a dagger and a zot-shot tucked into my boots.
Tarq and I ran at full speed, assuming we were leaving Milo and the others to trail behind us (except Thalien and Lanna, who almost always remained with the camp due to the amount of magical gear we all carried. That stuff was expensive).
However, it was times like this that I was forced to remember I was approaching sixty, and we had kids less than half my age with us. Liab charged between us on all fours, running half as fast as us again and in my peripheral vision, I caught sight of our resident half-elf thief converging through the snow on our right.
Less than a minute later, I heard the thump of someone impacting the snow, followed quickly by Liab’s sharp, breathy grunts of victory. As we ran up on the scene, Liab was sitting on the ground with one of his long arms around the shoulders of our runaway child, his other hand cupped securely over his mouth. He had the boy sitting on the ground before him with his legs hooked over the kid’s thighs to keep them secured.
Shay-Lee was kneeling beside them, her dagger out but folded back along her wrist and forearm. Any wrong move on the boy’s part would have that dagger finding a new sheath in his throat. To my surprise, Harmony was on the other side of Liab, rubbing her hand across the child’s head while her other hand pulled a blanket from the shoulder tote she was almost ever without. Another reminder that the younger women were faster than Tarq and me when they wanted to be. I made a mental note to lecture them both about taking unnecessary risks, given we still knew nothing about this child and how danger came in all forms. There was a reason Tarq and I went first, followed closely by Milo.
Straight away, something felt wrong. The child’s deflation as he realised there was no escape was to be expected, but something else was way off. Back at Tetorli, the kids were playful and curious, only to be chased by their elders with smirks and snowballs. More stringent discipline was sometimes necessary, but this boy’s reaction was another level of defeat.
If I had to hazard a guess, I’d say he was ten, maybe eleven. I declared him male since he only wore a loincloth, though truthfully, it was hard to tell at that age. I wasn’t a specialist in the age development of half-orcs.
Apart from the loincloth, something else that struck me as odd. As soon as he saw me, his gaze went to my covered wrists and then dropped to the ground between us. His shoulders also curled forward as much as Liab would let them. I got the distinct impression he would roll all the way forward with his brow to the ground if he were released, and that was definitely not the way of the snow half-orcs.
And then it hit me.
The boy’s head had been shaved, and very short white bristles, more common amongst my soldiers, barely penetrated his pale grey scalp. Even the youngest child at Tetorli wore their hair long with some manner of weight tied into the end to familiarise them with the handy weapon they’d use as they got older.
Which meant the boy wasn’t from Tetorli or any other native snow half-orc settlement… and we were less than a day’s march from Cerro Nexo, only hours from Jinis Ridge.
I really didn’t like the picture I was putting together in my head.
The poor kid trembled when I came forward, took the blanket hem and lifted it to cover his head … and stopped with a wordless gasp when I saw the back of his head had been branded with a series of letters and numbers that went all the way into his skull. It wasn’t a square brand and had been rolled across the contours to go from ear to ear. And it was old.
Fuck me.
My stomach fell into my feet, and I felt all the blood drain from my face.
“What the fuck is that?” Shay-Lee demanded, which galvanized me into moving.
I took complete control of the blanket from Harmony and quickly covered his upper body, telling her to grab out a second one. We wouldn’t get back to camp without being discovered, but I wanted to limit the spread of this knowledge. Our saving grace was the camp was in the middle of being set up, and most eyes were busy doing other things.
Regular half-orcs were known for fits of rage that would make them both deadly and loud, and I had no idea how the snow half-orcs, their intelligent brethren, would handle this. I needed to be smart. I needed my army to stay smart and not get swept up in blind fury. I needed to return this boy to our campsite and bring Felipe in on our discovery. I would also need to change the arrangement of my protective barrier to hide the chief’s reaction from his people, who would be watching.
To quote our thief … shit just got real.
Tarq took Shay-Lee’s place and slid his hands between the boy’s shoulders and Liab’s chest. “Sit still, lad,” he said quietly, then lifted him just enough from Liab that Harmony could wrap his lower half in the second blanket, completely hiding him from view. Cradled in Tarq’s large arms, the boy’s general shape would only come across as humanoid, including an adult dwarf or a young human, which was just what I’d hoped for. Harmony stayed at their side with her hand on the blanket near the boy’s head, her presence keeping him calm.
And to ensure we didn’t have any curious observers, the rest of us formed a loose, defensive circle around them, with me at the front and Milo in the rear, and we made our way back to the campsite.
I knew snow half-orcs preferred the cold of the elements, but in this instance, he would just have to deal with the human conditions. I modified the dome to give it a milky pigmentation that would blend in with the snow but not allow anyone else to spy on us; at the same time, I closed the opening to give us complete privacy. There was little doubt word would get back to Felipe, but I wanted to question the boy while ensuring he had something to eat before I brought in the snow half-orc chief. Felipe was going to be emotional enough as it was without making things worse.
“The fact that you can change its composition after the spell’s conclusion defies all logic,” Thalien said, lifting his eyes to the structure around us.
I understood how it looked from his viewpoint. Magic cast was then set in place. Another spell could replace it only if more powerful magic were cast or the original was dispelled. Whereas for me, it was a matter of having the amassed dust dots make a quarter turn to the left, no different than barking out the same command to an assembled army.
“This is not the norm,” I reminded him. “We’re presently at war, which has changed our dynamics temporarily. Very temporarily. Once we’re out the other side of this, should we be permitted to live with what we know, it will still be your job to create nightly cover when the weather turns against us and mine to cook dinner for you and Lanna. Just as it always has been.”
I wasn’t sure if he believed me; honestly, we had more pressing issues anyway. I had Shay-Lee gather up my comforter and ball it on the ground at the farthest point from the fire against the tree line, and I had Tarq deposit him on it while I fossicked through my bag for my canteen and some beef jerky that would give the kid a much-needed dose of protein.
The boy never moved as Harmony gently tugged the blanket from his head. “You’re safe now,” she crooned as his eyes met hers briefly, then jerked away to the floor. Unfortunately, when I stepped in front of him and squatted down, he gasped and curled into the tightest possible ball with his face pressed into his knees, covering his head with both hands (but not the brand, leading me to assume he’d been taught never to hide his identity) and proceeded to wet himself. The acrid stench meant he was severely dehydrated, but that too was the least of our worries.
I sighed and silently passed Harmony the food and the drink, then shuffled back a few feet without rising to give her room to work.
He’d been nervous around Harmony, but the sight of me terrified him. I sat on the ground beside the fire and crossed my legs, giving him time to settle. It amused me immensely to watch Lanna’s nose screw up as she approached them from Harmony’s side to not frighten the boy any more than he already was. With a few mumbled words, she cast her cleansing spell that took care of the comforter and the blankets (and knowing Lanna, the boy himself). Then, she moved around in front of the boy and knelt, leaning forward to peek through a gap in his arms. “What’s your name, honey?”
“SHO-8-1-4-3,” the boy barely whispered.
The same letter and number combination burned into his head—literally. I closed my eyes and breathed out slowly, refusing to call him that. My brain immediately started playing with the combination, shifting emphasis and accents. Until he selected a new name for himself, we needed to call him one that brushed up against his designation for the sake of familiarity but still sounded like a name. I opened my eyes and used a stick to write it out on the ground. By turning the 8 into a B, and the 1 into an I, it became …
“…Shobi,” I said, lifting my eyes to everyone. My friends were looking at me. The boy hadn’t moved. “SHO-8-1-4-3, from now on, we’ll call you Shobi. Nod if you understand.”
It made me sick to fall back on this mentality of barking orders at a frightened kid and watching his head wiggle forward and back under his hands, but soft words of comfort wouldn’t cut it. The boy would never believe them from me. I reminded him too much of what he had escaped from, and humans hadn’t been kind to him in that place. Augustus Morales, you need to survive long enough for me to get my hands on you. Then, and only then, will you be made to pay in full for all this.
“Alright, Shobi. I need you to eat the food and drink the water my friend is trying to give you, and to do that, you need to sit up. So, sit up.” I barely infused my words with command, but Shobi shot up so fast his head and shoulders knocked against Lanna and Harmony, who were both bowed over him, trying to coax him out. He still wouldn’t look at me, but he searched for the supplies, shoving the first jerky stick so far down his throat that he gagged.
Harmony tightened her grip on the rest and gently fed them to him in small, bite-sized pieces, intermittent with swigs of water. Thalien passed Lanna a short length of fabric which she wrapped around Shobi’s head like a bandana, covering his slave brand. He gasped and tensed, his hand reaching to drag the material away. Harmony did her patented shushing croon that took much of the fight from him. “It’s going to be okay, sweetie,” she whispered, feeding him another piece of jerky.
I watched their interaction, and knowing he was in safe hands, I twisted away from him and stood up to avoid frightening him. “Where are you going?” Tarq asked, also rising. I glanced over my shoulder to answer my friend but found the way the boy was staring at Tarq like he’d lost his mind much more interesting. It wasn’t hard to guess that he wasn’t used to an alternate race speaking that way to a human in authority.
“Word of our young friend would have reached Chief Felipe by now.” I used the honorific for the child’s sake, and sadly, he made no reaction to the title of his people’s leader. I wondered if he knew what chief even meant. “He might want to keep the boy close, or he might want to send him back to Tetorli with some of the fighters to keep him safe.”
“I’m coming with you.”
“Tarq …”
“You’re about to tell the snow half-orc chief that our enemies have been enslaving his people without his knowledge or yours long enough to have a man-child with no clue of his heritage. If you think I’m not going to stand between you and him while he rages, you have clearly forgotten who you’re dealing with.”
I raked my fingers through my short hair and sighed. “Very well.”
Unfortunately, Felipe took it about as well as I had expected.
* * *
((All comments welcome. Good or bad, I'd love to hear your thoughts 🥰🤗 ))
For more of my work including WPs: Angel466 or an index of previous WPS here.
FULL INDEX OF WE PLAN, GODS LAUGH TO DATE CAN BE FOUND HERE!!

Started working at Walgreens a few months ago with the intent of going back and forth between front end and pharmacy. Thought it would be nice to go into pharmacy so I can train and have some sort of job skill that would be helpful to me.
As I start working there, one of the pharmacy workers is under investigation for…let’s just say, some pretty heinous stuff, but because they haven’t been deemed guilty, they were hired back anyway. This combined with piss poor management causes at least five people to up and quit within the span of a couple weeks. Store boss then gets fired for being in multiple store violations.
I immediately transitioned from working part time to full when moving to the pharmacy and as a person with autism, it’s been a nightmare. Not only have I not received any training but my schedule has been written up the week of for at least the past two months and we’re still short staffed. Being closed on Memorial Day has screwed us over considerably and we’re now dealing with 100 scrips a day and counting. One of our pharmacists has fallen ill. Our phone has been ringing off the hook because people want to check their prescriptions. Doctors aren’t sending them in on time. And during all this, I’m still trying to learn the job.
I’ve used more than half of my sick days due to mental health struggles. It’s a crime to get six sick days a year. I’m very tired. I don’t look forward to having to look for another job. I want this one to work and I think I have what it takes to be good at it. But if another customer yells at me I feel like I’m either going to vomit or punch a hole through the drive thru window. Or both.

HERE are some pictures and videos taken by me or others over the course of the last year and a half.
My local university was conducting a medical study on the affects of different diets on weight gain. I signed up and was chosen and the potential money to be made was very appealing. The first two months of the study involved simply eating at a calorie surplus on a premade diet to see how it affected my body’s weight gain. After taking measurements after these initial two months, if my body’s measurements represented any kind of high percentile outlier, I would be selected to potentially continue for the entire 1.5 year study focused on a particular area of the body. Of all of the participants, my abdominal girth was at the highest percentile ratio of girth compared to weight/height, so they selected me to participate focusing on abdominal weight gain and to see how severe it could be.
They paid me about $3,000 a month and had all of my food paid for as I followed a specific premade diet plan that changed every 2 or 3 months to study the affects these specific diets had. Some were dairy heavy, carb heavy, specific types of meats only, mixing in alcohol consumption, specific supplements, etc. I’m incredibly busy in my life with work right now and having a free premade meal plan plus so much extra cash was too good to pass up. So I decided to continue for the entire 1.5 year study.
Fast forward to now, having finished the entire trial, I am starting to have some serious regrets. I’ve put on nearly 115 pounds since last January and I never expected the results to have me looking like this. Honestly, I think even the researchers themselves were really shocked by my result. My ratio of abdominal girth to height/weight is at the highest percentile of the study, their entire student body, and anyone who has participated in the study before. I gained most all of the weight in my torso, which they are severely attributing to genetics and simply the effectiveness of the tailored diets they had me following.
I obviously look ridiculous now. I haven’t even been able to keep up with buying a new professional wardrobe for work (as you can tell my the pictures and videos linked). I was gaining an average of 7 pounds a month, some months being just 3 pounds and some being an entire 15 pounds in a month. So many things are difficult… I break a sweat going up one flight of stairs, I can hardly put my shoes or socks on, fitting into restaurant booths is nearly impossible, getting in and out of my car or off the couch takes preparation. People stare at me in stores or on the street. I had a homeless guy ask me “Jesus Christ, what the fuck? Are you pregnant, dude?” once. My coworkers are polite but make comments here and there.
I haven’t seen my family since early in the study when the weight gain wasn’t very noticeable. I’m seeing them in 2 weeks for a reunion, and I cannot even imagine what they are going to say. I didn’t tell them I took part in this because I knew they wouldn’t approve, but now I wish I had because how am I going to prepare them or explain to them why I look like this now and how it happened so fast. I’m worried to fit on the plane on the way there and having to travel. I’m so nervous to see them. And honestly would like any genuine opinions of whether or not I’m blowing this out of proportion or if they are genuinely going to be shocked. Maybe I can hide it better if I find the right clothing.
I really regret doing this now for the most part and hope I’m able to start reversing it as soon as possible. Thanks for letting me vent. Happy to also answer any questions on what I learned nutritionally and what the different diets did and how they affected me too.

But I’m British, born and raised in England and moved to the US when I was ten. I’ve had an education in both countries and I feel like it’s pretty common knowledge that the Union Jack is not there English flag. The English flag is white with a Red Cross. The Union Jack is for the United Kingdom which includes wales.
Between Kara’s tacky accents and Nate calling the Union Jack the English flag insinuating it doesn’t include wales, I’m really upset.
I’ve been back to England once since I moved. Purely due to travel being expensive and considered a luxury to so many Americans.
I know they’ve worked hard for what they have but I really wish they would respect England a lot more. Everytime they’ve gone there, I’ve just seen them act like tourists, why doesn’t England get the same respect that other countries they visit get? You wouldn’t make fun of another countries accent so why is England such a cheap shot?
I love their videos but I’m extremely proud of my heritage and also very homesick and it’s just so upsetting to see them minimize an opportunity that I would literally do anything to get.
Sorry for the rant but they’ve upset me with this one.

İ have nearly 40k trophies and all my brawlers beyond 500 trophies at least. So recently I was playing with Sprout. It was around 600 trophies but i lost nearly all mu matches even against the bots and now it has Luke 520 trophies. What happened to me xD I was good before today but today no matter which game mode or map I am so bad Any suggestions? İ would appreciate

The goal of this post is to share experiences related to receiving student loan payment refunds from Nelnet. I am hoping it will help others in my situation.
I originally made eight student loan payments totaling $13K throughout 2020 and 2021 to MyFedLoan. My remaining loan balances were transferred to Nelnet in early 2022.
In August 2022, I requested from Nelnet to refund the eight student loan payments, largely due to potential loan forgiveness under President Biden’s proposal but also because my state provides a state income tax credit for loan payments.
There was nearly no activity on my account until nine months later in April 2023, half ($6K) of my requested loans were reinstated on my Nelnet account and department of education account. Since the reinstatement 30 days ago, I haven’t seen any refund checks or additional reinstated loans.
The entire process has been a complete nightmare. I am concerned about the student loan payment pause ending and my case still being unresolved. I have contacted Nelnet numerous times, unfortunately there is nothing they can do. I’ve also contacted the DOE/FAFSA and the treasury, no one is able to help me or give me any information on my account.
If anyone is going through a similar situation or has any information/contacts, I appreciate any help. Thank you and good luck with your pending refunds.

TL;DR below Montreal, Quebec, Canada
I got into an accident recently. I was in a 3-way intersection that had stop signs all around. I stopped, performed my visual checks, and then proceeded to turn into the street. The offending party ran their stop sign, hitting my vehicle. The offending party was coming in at a high rate of speed (twice the speed limit). In addition, the offending party was nowhere near the intersection when I was performing my visual checks. Seconds prior to being hit I stopped my vehicle and began to sound my horn. The reason I came at a complete stop because had I gone forward a bit more I'd get hit in the driver's side of the door (the impact was on my front bumper). As verified by my mechanic, there are tons of damages such as driver side shocks, tire rods, bumper, below bumper covers, etc. However, my front bumper (place of impact) looks barely damaged. Turning my steering wheel produces a large rubbery squeaking noise, almost as if I'm captaining a ship.
In this case, would I be covered by one-way insurance in the province of Quebec? From my understanding Quebec is a no-fault state. But I'm not sure how I'd fair out in this regard. Any advice would help me.
Also, what are my options legally? I exchanged information with the offending party. However, I never reported to the police since my broker (called insurance broker minutes after accident) told me the police would only come if the offending party was unruly, unwilling to cooperate (such as no exchange info), and getting violent. Offending party was none of that except a bit rude in the exchange of words (elderly fellow). As such, do I still have the ability to make a police report? The entire event was captured by my dashcam. Therefore, I'm not really worried about having my facts corroborated by anyone. I would also like to note that I have never once mentioned to the offending party of my having a dashcam. Offending party would not be willing to accept blame whatsoever and was saying it was up to insurance.
I would also like to share the video but I'm not sure if I should since I made a claim with my insurance recently.
Questions: - Can I still make a police report with the video evidence in mind?

• What are the legal ramifications for posting a video of an accident during an in-progress investigation with insurance?
  
• Are there additional routes I can take given my circumstance?
  

TL;DR Got into an accident recently. I was driving a vehicle and so was the offending party. Anyways, I was at 3-way intersection with stop signs all around. After stopping and performing my visual checks, I proceeded to enter the intersection and turn. In the process of turning is when the offending party was speeding with no intention of slowing down. I was hit. We exchanged info and left. Police report was never filed at the scene. Offending party wasn't willing to accept fault whatsoever and reiterated how it's up to our insurances to assign fault. There is video evidence (dashcam video) available with me to corroborate the facts. Therefore, I'm not worried about gathering witnesses.

It’s difficult for me to talk to anyone about this, let alone ask the internet, but I’ve hit a roadblock.
I’m in an emotionally difficult situation with my family and I just don’t know what to do. I feel so helpless and stuck and I’m hoping to get advice on how to best handle this.
My father has been abusing my mother for the past 10 years. Recently, it’s gotten to a point where I feel like it’s my responsibility to step in and do something. But I have no idea how to handle it.
My mother won’t leave him because she is afraid of what he would do to our family. He has a volatile temper and it is scary to be anywhere near him. I just can’t stand to see my mother in this situation, yet I’m not sure what I can do to make it better.
I love my father, but his behavior is unacceptable and it’s making life unbearable for our family. I’m desperately seeking advice from those who may have gone through a similar situation. I could really use any advice anyone can offer on how to best handle this emotionally difficult family situation.

Looking to spend an evening a week chatting with friendly redditors? Hammersmith Hang Out is for you.
So what happens at this meetup?
Each week this meet up is held in a pub - we all sit around a table and generally chat about anything we can think of.. that's pretty much all there is to it! There are usually a few who will get dinner from the Thai restaurant at the pub. We get people aged from 18 to in their 60s, but the majority are 24-40. You can turn up at any time, people usually start leaving between 9 and closing, there are nearly always plenty left at closing time (last orders - 11). Currently we are averaging 15-25 people turning up.
Do you talk about reddit and memes all evening?
No! reddit is hardly ever mentioned, there are no laptops in sight and we've had plenty of people who have not used reddit.
Can I come along?
Of course - that is why it is posted on LSC each week, the meet up is very newbie friendly - we have people new to LSC join us regularly. If you're very very shy don't hesitate to message/text/call me ahead of the pub and let me know, I'll do what I can to get you chatting away with everyone as if you've been every week.
What if I don't want alcohol?
No problem! The pub also serves various soft drinks, fruit juices, tea, coffee and water. We have non-drinkers often.
Since after the above people still asked...
I'm ********* is it OK if I come along?
We have had men, women, transgender, British, foreign (even a northerner or two), gay, straight, drinkers, non-drinkers, smokers, non-smokers, religious and non-religious
In fact, the only people who wouldn't be welcome are those under 18 or anyone who is not able to conduct themselves appropriately in an adult social situation.
Initial meetup.
Location/Time: Latymers, W6 8BS / People often start turning up from 19:00ish but can be as early as 18:30. I'll get there for 19:00-19.30.
Pic here to force the preview image
Our tables are reserved, we start on the circular tables close to the entrance and we might spill over onto the table(s) nearby.
The first table will either be outside or at the front to the right of the door. (also, there will be Reddit on the reserved signs And hopefully Snoo)
There's a (usually quiet) optional Whatsapp group for the meetup - message me via chat for an invite link. (whatsapp group is pretty much only me posting this link each week and trying to get people to actually respond.. So no benefit of being in it if you're not showing up).

I have an a7iii mounted on a MAGICRIG cage. I want to add a wheel to the rig that allows me to control the camera's zoom function with my right index finger for quick in-and-out shots of reality type footage. The wheel should be positioned horizontally instead of vertically, to allow easier control with the right index finger while holding a side handle. Consequently, the wheel should be positioned on top of the handle that's attached to the right side of the rig. Can you recommend the parts for this? Thank you so much.

Lots of people think that the Thunder will have a dominant run in the west soon with the players we have and the potential they all carry but one team that really worries me is the Spurs.
They have a good young wing in Devin Vassell who is a good 3 and D player. He has improved every season and has progressed into being able to create his own shot and a killer mid range. He was averaging 20 ppg before he got injured and was superb from 3 all season. (missed around 40 games this season)
Keldon Johnson led the team in scoring this season although his efficiency dipped from previous years which has a lot to do with the teammates he was given most of the season. Imagine him now with reliable teammates in offense now back in Vassell and now Wemby.
Sochan, who imo has some killer potential, is an underrated playmaker who can run point at times and was such a good defender as a rookie. His offense greatly improved as the year went by which shows this mans work ethic.
Malaki Branham is another player who went under the radar. He averaged 14 ppg to the end the season on good shooting splits and showed sparks all year.
And last but not least Wemby who needs no explanation. Not to mention the three first round picks who they absolutely fleeced the hawks for, which if the hawks continue to go downhill , can be very juicy.
Honorable mention is Tre Jones who while I don’t think is a future starter in this league , he can be a very reliable backup like his brother Tyus. The man is a vicious on ball defender and keeps turnovers to the minimum.
I think this team will give us the most problems if things turn out like they seem. I’m excited for our future but beware of the spurs.

out of the former warlords, who do you think wins in a 1v1?
Doflamingo: the goat, a pirate that rose from that very day that the pirate era began, through his blood and heritage holding the world government hostage, being the main man in the underworld having everything at the disposal of his finger tips, having Kaido by his side, all this while ruling Dressrosa for ages with the power of his df and pirate group, born a celestial dragon, Joker is one of the very few that can use all three types of haki, a very strong, resourceful fighter, in Dressrosa he lost to Luffy and Law, but to me he was certainly the strongest individual in the island, as much as Luffy dealt the final blow, without help idk he he wins, Doffy ripped Law apart, literally, took a hit from Sanji that left Sanji saying if they were to clash again Doffy would break the bones on his leg with an attack or two, Doffy I think is the first or one of the first awakened df users, and this shows in how enhanced his df power and strength was, the fact no one could break free from his cage, and Doffy had this out while going blow for blow with gear 3 and 4 Luffy I think is crazy, Doflamingo is a Luffy victim which will always make people rank him lower than more recent characters, but that shouldn't be the case, I think there's very few characters that can dispatch opponent with their df like Doffy can, and if that doesn't work he can go blow for blow with his (intermediate) armament and conquerors haki coating, he managed to break free from Kuzans ice for god sake, how many you think can shatter that ice from within, his very chore physical capabilities are out of this world, could easily break Sanjis leg with two blows for strength, faster than Luffy in gear two and fast enough to dodge gear 3, deal some of the strongest strikes we have seen on Luffy until Kaido clashes, Doffys cage was able to contain Zoro and Fujitora, Fufitoras meteor just being sliced by the cage strings lets note, incredible durability and intelligence, so one of the strongest most gifted physical fighters we have seen, with all three types of haki and a great df that he's awakened, the goat Joker.
Crocodile: dispatched early in the series, now again relevant being a major part of the Cross Guild, our sand man, introduced early in the story when haki wasn't explained yet, a time where logia fruits seen superior, unbeatable, Croco boi was the first antagonist that beat Luffy, leaving him for dead, if it wasn't for Robin the story could have needed right there in Alabasta, now further in the story Crocodile has co-founded an organisation with a yonko in it, and Croco boi now can brag of a bounty of nearly 2 billion berries, in terms of his kit it's simple a logia fruit that makes him a sand man, can eliminate fodder by draining them simply by touching them, Crocodile was stated that he had haki but this was no longer the case as he had "lost his will" his ambition, now looking at the part in the story we are in, some speculate that his again desiring and has ambitions and would most likely be able to use haki, I'm not one to automatically grant haki so I can't say yes he has haki, maybe he do maybe he don't, most likely he don't, a fighter that is very reliant on his df, but a very strong fruit so it's ok, good kit, strong man, considering he's now relevant again and put side by side with Mihawk he could actually be very strong but I'm not so convinced.
Let's be honest put the Cross Guild hype to the side, the heavenly demon is the goat and slaps Croco boi with a conquerors haki infused kick.
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I found a really cool mod that hits all the points I'm going for with my 1.19.2 modpack called IterRPG. However it has one biome in it that's just horrible to see. It doesn't look good at all to me, the wood trees are unique but not nearly the same style as everything else, the grass is a weird lime green and just isn't fun to be anywhere near.
I was wondering if anyone had any tips on how I can prevent this biome type from spawning.

I’ve been on Depo shot for a couple years now, I just started dating a partner who I had previously been with before, so I decided to get my shot again, (I Had completely stopped taking it for about 6 months) While my body regulated after being off the shot I felt great, my sex drive was healthy, and i had lots of energy, and generally happy. I started seeing my partner again about two months ago, things were exciting and i could easily get into the mood, I really enjoyed everything. About a week after getting my shot, i noticed everyday i became more lethargic, depressed, and the thought of doing anything intimate actually disgusts me. Now I feel extremely irritable, I want to cringe whenever my partner wants to do anything. I know my birth control caused my extreme attitude towards my relationship and life in general, because I felt like this every time on the shot but never suspected anything until recently. I feel so anxious and it’s hard to even do basic tasks everyday. I regret getting back on the shot, so now im just riding it out until it leaves my body again. What can I do to feel decently better in terms of libido/mood swings?
TLDR; Depo shot killed my sex drive Anxious, depressed, extremely tired, disinterest in doing things How to increase libido on BC?

Hey,
I'm just starting Bleach, I'm episode 19 and in the episode there's an amazing shot of Ichigo SPOIL !!!
coming from the pit, with new outfit and hollow mask
Could you help me find a wallpaper or an artwork for this ? Whatever the size, and the exact same picture in better quality or another one, I don't care ;)
I started looking but I don't want to spoil upcoming event or new form for him, already saw some things I shouldn't ...
This shot :
https://www.shoshosein.com/sites/default/files/episodes/bleach/bleach19-11.jpg
Thanks a lot !

I have 4 dogs. One is reactive to people he doesn’t know (as in tries to nip and growls). One is mildly reactive to dogs while he is on a leash (barking and lunging, not in an aggressive way, but still not great either.)
My dog who is reactive to people he doesn’t know, grew up in a cage his whole life. I adopted him at 7 years old and he was just terrified of the world around him. He would bite peoples pants leg or just generally growl at anyone who came near him. I have been introducing him to people and making sure to watch his triggers and he seems way happier. He hasn’t growled at anyone in almost two weeks. I just feel like he doesn’t have the fear that a person is going to hurt him. He now enjoys seeing my friends when they come over and even goes to sit near them. I still watch him closely and anyone who comes to my house knows about his issues and what to watch out for, but it feels good that he doesn’t cower away in his cage and is happy to get treats from my friends and family.
My other dog, I have had for 5 years. Got him as a puppy. I lived in a really remote area so didn’t really get to socialize him when he was a puppy. I started to notice that he would bark and lunge when he saw other dogs. It seemed like it genuinely stressed him out. We moved to a bigger house in a suburb area with a large yard. My dog are able to run free and have plenty of space to run and play. We also have play dates with other dogs (he is only reactive when on a leash). I stopped walking him because he seemed stressed and constantly on alert. Yesterday, I just felt like maybe he wanted a walk so we went for a walk. We encountered so many dogs and he just sat and ignored them. He remembered the training I gave him even after a year of not using it. When he pooped and I went to scoop it, he sat next to me and waited patiently. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a dog coming so I tried to hurry and braved myself for the worst. He saw the other dog, looked back at me and continued waiting. I was absolutely floored! No barking or lunging. It was amazing.
I don’t know why I am posting this but it feels good knowing that my dogs aren’t feeling that constant anxiety anymore.

I am going to share another article here, because truly understanding this concept has been a huge life saver and help for me in everything that I do, and especially in helping my kids when their emotions arise:
Growing up in a narcissistic family environment can make it challenging for survivors to disconnect from a constant state of defense and reactivity. Learning to understand and control one’s emotions may feel like a whole new mountain to climb.
Your upbringing may have made it difficult for you to recognize and express your feelings, as well as to calm yourself down when you’re feeling upset. The inability to process your emotions can also leave you feeling confused, frustrated, and like you lack control over your actions.
It’s possible that you are still operating under survival mode.
However, there is a way to understand and make sense of your feelings. By learning about how your emotions are processed, how triggers work, and how feelings work, you can regain control over your reactions and regain a sense of balance.

Emotions

Emotions are a natural and normal part of being human. They provide valuable information about what is good, what is bad and what is dangerous. They are designed to alert us to immediate dangers or rewards and are a primitive instinct that exists within us for the purpose of our survival. Emotions manifest physically, and can be detected or measured. For example, when you experience an emotion, you may get a high heartbeat, you may sweat, your blood pressure will rise, and you may shake.
Feeling fear when encountering a pack of wolves while taking a walk alone in the forest is useful. In this example, fear alerts us to an immediate danger. Fear makes sense and is doing what it’s supposed to do.
Feeling disgust when being forced to interact with a person who is the source of your pain and trauma also makes sense. Disgust is essentially telling you: Toxic person alert. Do not go near. Your body is giving you a warning.

Dr. Paul Ekman’s Model of Universal Emotions

There are six basic emotions that are universally recognized across cultures: anger, fear, joy, contempt, disgust, and sadness.

The 6 Universal Emotions

Anger

This emotion is characterized by feelings of frustration, irritability, and aggression. It may be triggered by a perceived threat, injustice, or when you are blocked from doing something. The associated behavior may include assertiveness, confrontation, and the desire to take action.

Fear

This emotion is characterized by feelings of anxiety, nervousness, and apprehension. It may be triggered by a perceived danger or threat, and the associated behavior may include fleeing, hiding, or freezing.

Joy

This emotion is characterized by feelings of happiness, contentment, and pleasure. It may be triggered by positive experiences or events, and the associated behavior may include smiling, laughing, and expressing excitement.

Contempt

This emotion is characterized by disdain, superiority, and disgust. It may be triggered by behaviors or actions that are perceived as beneath one’s own standards, and the associated behavior may include eye-rolling, sneering, and a dismissive attitude.

Disgust

This emotion is characterized by feelings of revulsion, distaste, and abhorrence. It may be triggered by something that is perceived as dirty, vile, or dangerous, and the associated behavior may include wrinkling the nose, gagging, and avoiding contact.

Sadness

This emotion is characterized by feelings of sorrow, disappointment, and despair. It may be triggered by loss, rejection, or disappointment, and the associated behavior may include crying, withdrawing, and seeking comfort.

We Can’t Not Feel Emotions. That Is Not Possible. We Must Learn to Work with Them.

Emotions can be powerful and can drive us to act impulsively. Because of this, they can also hinder our ability to focus on long-term solutions that require careful processing and consideration of various sources of information. For example, you may feel angry at a boss for giving you extra work on a Friday afternoon, but if you act on that emotion and express your anger in the heat of the moment, it could lead to negative consequences such as getting fired for disrespecting an authority figure. In this case, it may be better to let the emotion pass and instead work on a long-term plan, such as finding a better job or organizing a meeting to address the issues.
Furthermore, it is possible that after gathering all the facts, you may have found out that the boss’s wife was in the hospital, and out of all the employees, the big boss trusted you the most to get the job done. While your anger zoomed in on your inability to leave work at a decent time on Friday night, it did not have all the information needed to see the situation as a whole. Acting on your anger would not only have cost you your job, but also would have damaged your professional reputation.
In the heat of the moment, our emotions may not allow us to see that there are other ways of solving problems or that there are other factors unknown to us at play. It is important for us to learn to control our impulses and ask questions first in order to gain full clarity of a situation. We are always responsible for our actions, and our actions always have consequences as they affect the world around us. Clear communication is crucial, and it is always our responsibility to try and understand what it is that we are dealing with before choosing how we will react to it.
Think of emotions as if they were like little storms inside our head that can make it hard to think straight.
You may find yourself in many situations where you must allow for these little storm to pass before taking an action, so that you may see the bigger picture under a clear blue sky.
Our emotions can also misinterpret a situation, such as feeling fear when watching a horror movie or being happy around someone who is not good for us. We can feel fear even though we are physically safe in a movie theater. We can feel joy when we receive a text from a person who has ghosted us for a week. (This article is long, continue reading here if you are interested: https://artflorentyna.com/how-do-i-control-my-emotions-after-surviving-a-narcissistic-family-system/

Idk what to think, or do?
It is currently 6:15 in the morning for me, I have not slept because this is really bothering me and idk what to do. So last night I told my girlfriend i was going to workout and she said she was as well, so yk i do my workout and i don’t text her, so i finish then i hop on my game and i play with my friend. So we’re playing and still i have no reply from her, so from time to time i would check to see if she read it or if i’m on delivered, mind you we both worked out late, i worked out at 12 which would be 1 am for her, so i check and nothing, okay cool i’m not stressing. Couple min go by I check again but this time idk why but i clicked on her info and it showed me her location. her location was at work at nearly 2 am, mind you her work closes at 10 pm. So i’m thinking this is wrong so i go back and click it again, no she’s still there. I go back and forth just to see if it’s my phone then it turns into her still being at work but her location being live? whatever that means? and it stays like that for about 5-10 min? then suddenly she’s back at home and it says she’s live again so she’s at home. So now i’m overthinking all of this and a part of me wants to think maybe it was just the location thing being laggy or my phone being weird because no way she’d be at work at 2 am??????? whatever so i know she could tell something was up but i don’t wanna tell her and be like “oh hey i was looking at your location and you were at work at 2 am what were you doing?” i think that’s weird on my part? maybe i shouldn’t say anything at all. and when we talked on facetime she gave me all of the drama that’s been going on and i’m like no way she went out right? plus she never mentioned it? so i feel like i’m going crazy here and i don’t know what to do!?!?! my friend told me to check her location again at 1am and see if she goes there again but to not say anything and wait.

I thought I was done teaching for good in June 2021 after 6 years at the same middle school, but once I got pregnant, I felt like maybe I should give teaching another shot due to the schedule (and because I missed being surrounded by the energy a little bit). So I took a position teaching at a Title I high school in January 2023 when my son was 6 months old.
Seeing my classroom at this school was a little disheartening, not going to lie. I teach art and the classroom had 0 sinks and no closets. The only windows are small and almost ceiling level. The tables have dents and scratches which make drawing difficult. The classroom I had at the middle school was great—3 sinks, 3 fully stocked closets, huge windows and a patio overlooking the soccer field and the woods. I was rethinking things for the first month or two.
But my students and I bonded surprisingly quickly and many of them had been begging to meet my baby. So I made the decision to bring him in for last 2 hours of the last half day of school (an exam makeup day where 90% of the kids are absent). One girl who is in my class is extremely smart but has been diagnosed with ODD—but she and I get along swimmingly. She hadn’t planned on coming but made her mom bring her to school yesterday for the sole purpose of meeting him.
All the kids who had been hearing about him this year were so excited meet him! Even the boys wanted to hold him. I thought the kids would lose interest after a little while but they played with him and absolutely doted on him. It really ended the school year on a high note for me. I feel a little refreshed and even though there are many difficult days working with kids who struggle with some serious challenges at home, seeing them be so kind and loving makes me feel like I’m making the right choice in teaching there.
So there’s my feel-good story to cap off the school year. I’d love to hear about any of your successful moments this year!