Dear readers, I’ve contemplated posting for awhile- but at this point I’ve lost myself and feel like I’ve gone insane. I dedicated my life to a man the last year, after meeting on Facebook dating. I had my own apartment, job, friends and life I made after a long domestic abusive relationship 3 years prior. This man swooped me off my feet, but wasn’t ready for a relationship- being the stubborn Scorpio I am I was relentless and kept pursuing him. Couple months later he was needing somewhere to live so I let him come live with me. He worked at a strip club, nightshift, never texted me back or would give me the time of day. He was arrested not long into our relationship and I stuck by his side. Finally we made it official, and I found out some darker things about him. He cheated on his ex the whole 4 years they where together. He had a shrine of all the sex videos, and pictures of every women he’s ever been with, flash drives upon flash drive. Personal ads. Gambling and getting hotel rooms, and constantly lying to his ex. I found out and he lied. Until he knew I had all the proof, then he admitted his regretted his past. Found out he has a porn addiction. He lied about going to work and being at a bar, went far enough as to fake and make up a Uber receipt because I told him he needed to prove he was at work, then find out he has been flirting and trying to sleep with his boss the first couple months of our relationship. I decided he needed location on his phone but seems anytime he leaves- it wants to malfunction, or it won’t have his drive speed and seems glitchy. I’ve suspected he knows developing things and good with technology sense I’ve seen GitHub and some Key-base codes in his phone. He says he isn’t cheating and telling lies anymore. But every apartment we have lived at it seems he is having a affair with someone in the complex. I am certain he sneaks women into the apartment anytime he can even when I’m there. I have caught him making ads and being a editor for escorts websites and he says he isn’t it’s spam. I feel like I’m going crazy and unsure of what’s real and not real. My friend mentioned she thought I was being trafficked because I’ve been having memory loss, waking up bruised and with burns. And just nothing around me seems to make any sense. If anyone has any advice or input or idea on helping me. I’d appreciate the input!

Dear readers, I’ve contemplated posting for awhile- but at this point I’ve lost myself and feel like I’ve gone insane. I dedicated my life to a man the last year, after meeting on Facebook dating. I had my own apartment, job, friends and life I made after a long domestic abusive relationship 3 years prior. This man swooped me off my feet, but wasn’t ready for a relationship- being the stubborn Scorpio I am I was relentless and kept pursuing him. Couple months later he was needing somewhere to live so I let him come live with me. He worked at a strip club, nightshift, never texted me back or would give me the time of day. He was arrested not long into our relationship and I stuck by his side. Finally we made it official, and I found out some darker things about him. He cheated on his ex the whole 4 years they where together. He had a shrine of all the sex videos, and pictures of every women he’s ever been with, flash drives upon flash drive. Personal ads. Gambling and getting hotel rooms, and constantly lying to his ex. I found out and he lied. Until he knew I had all the proof, then he admitted his regretted his past. Found out he has a porn addiction. He lied about going to work and being at a bar, went far enough as to fake and make up a Uber receipt because I told him he needed to prove he was at work, then find out he has been flirting and trying to sleep with his boss the first couple months of our relationship. I decided he needed location on his phone but seems anytime he leaves- it wants to malfunction, or it won’t have his drive speed and seems glitchy. I’ve suspected he knows developing things and good with technology sense I’ve seen GitHub and some Key-base codes in his phone. He says he isn’t cheating and telling lies anymore. But every apartment we have lived at it seems he is having a affair with someone in the complex. I am certain he sneaks women into the apartment anytime he can even when I’m there. I have caught him making ads and being a editor for escorts websites and he says he isn’t it’s spam. I feel like I’m going crazy and unsure of what’s real and not real. My friend mentioned she thought I was being trafficked because I’ve been having memory loss, waking up bruised and with burns. And just nothing around me seems to make any sense. If anyone has any advice or input or idea on helping me. I’d appreciate the input!

Dear readers, I’ve contemplated posting for awhile- but at this point I’ve lost myself and feel like I’ve gone insane. I dedicated my life to a man the last year, after meeting on Facebook dating. I had my own apartment, job, friends and life I made after a long domestic abusive relationship 3 years prior. This man swooped me off my feet, but wasn’t ready for a relationship- being the stubborn Scorpio I am I was relentless and kept pursuing him. Couple months later he was needing somewhere to live so I let him come live with me. He worked at a strip club, nightshift, never texted me back or would give me the time of day. He was arrested not long into our relationship and I stuck by his side. Finally we made it official, and I found out some darker things about him. He cheated on his ex the whole 4 years they where together. He had a shrine of all the sex videos, and pictures of every women he’s ever been with, flash drives upon flash drive. Personal ads. Gambling and getting hotel rooms, and constantly lying to his ex. I found out and he lied. Until he knew I had all the proof, then he admitted his regretted his past. Found out he has a porn addiction. He lied about going to work and being at a bar, went far enough as to fake and make up a Uber receipt because I told him he needed to prove he was at work, then find out he has been flirting and trying to sleep with his boss the first couple months of our relationship. I decided he needed location on his phone but seems anytime he leaves- it wants to malfunction, or it won’t have his drive speed and seems glitchy. I’ve suspected he knows developing things and good with technology sense I’ve seen GitHub and some Key-base codes in his phone. He says he isn’t cheating and telling lies anymore. But every apartment we have lived at it seems he is having a affair with someone in the complex. I am certain he sneaks women into the apartment anytime he can even when I’m there. I have caught him making ads and being a editor for escorts websites and he says he isn’t it’s spam. I feel like I’m going crazy and unsure of what’s real and not real. My friend mentioned she thought I was being trafficked because I’ve been having memory loss, waking up bruised and with burns. And just nothing around me seems to make any sense. If anyone has any advice or input or idea on helping me. I’d appreciate the input!

I wanted to bring this topic up because I can’t be the only one! I’m all for being a girls girl and of course support SW (as I am myself), but it just bursts my bubble when I see 1,000 of spam of “subscribe to my of” “it’s free” “$3.50 video call” over and over and over again.. that’s not even what makes me most annoyed. I feel like as a guy or girl who is participating in paying for this service I wouldn’t want to see not only the spam everyday but the “professional photos/ porn” that’s constantly being repeated I feel like the raw homemade is so much better plus why are you paying for porn when they don’t even respond!!It’s not that these girls are fake or anything it’s just they have “so many” subscribers they just do it for the money.. I’m sorry but if you’re paying for an OF the least someone could do is interact with there subscribers! I could go on and on about this because it irks me lol, maybe I just really like homemade porn but why pay for professional porn when it’s already on pornhub? To everyone who has an only fans this was definitely not directed towards you it was more so directed towards the only fans robots ☺️

So I’m an (18 year old woman) and I used to watch lesbian porn back when I was younger (maybe 15-16) and it turned me on a lot but then it got boring. so I moved to straight porn and it turned me on again, after awhile I realized that I was only paying attention to the man instead of both sides, I don’t really like to fetish anything but I’ve been only watching YAOI. I mean I think it’s hot watching gay buff men go crazy on each other but I can’t watch the ones that happens irl it’s just kinda boring and kinda fake there’s no real romance there. I mean I tried going back to watching lesbian porn but I just don’t get wet anymore it’s just boring now I just look at them and compare my body, and I always seek male validation.. I mean I’m not a “pick me” or anything but if there was a guy that was my type I would definitely act like one. I just love getting their attention, all I think about is MEN, MEN, MEN.

Would you like to be an au pair for a much older man, taking care of all his needs and ensuring his home is neat and tidy? If so please click on the chat link and start talking, leading with your age and location.
You:

• any legal age under about 25
• live in England or able to get there!
• any religion as long as you don't mind me being agnostic
• any ethnicity
• bisexual also welcome provided you regard our relationship as your "prime" one.
• want to have children early

Me:

• white, 5'11" blue eyes, brown hair
• professional, work remotely but I have to be in England to work.
• needs exercise - New Years Resolution to do cycling!
• enjoys musicals and theatre
• not rich but high income. I'd be paying all living costs
• married but have lived separately for 15 years or so
• 3 (possibly 4) adult children (19-24)

I live in a large village but it has a railway station just 5 mins away on a direct line to London.
I believe that in a relationship I should help you achieve your goal in life, whether it's a career or being a stay at home parent, but I'm there to be a partner, not baby you 24/7. Similarly, although I want someone younger, you're not my slave (except in fun roleplay!).
Sex
I'm quite vanilla sexually and my primary kinks are the age difference and potential breeding (with associated kinks such as cream-pies, breastfeeding etc). I'm not really into anal sex but butt plugs and other sex toys are fine with me. I'm not an exhibitionist but if you want to have sex in the woods, fields or anywhere else its certainly up for discussion.
I'm really turned on by the idea of filling your young fertile pussy with my seed and whilst I won't push you about it, I'd really like you to stop birth control and hopefully get pregnant so I can enjoy feeling our baby grow inside you and your breasts fill (which I hope you'll let me milk too). I'm not looking to use condoms, so whether you get pregnant or not will be entirely your decision. If you're horny and your partner is asleep, its okay to start things unless they tell you to let them get some sleep. I like spooning, ideally with my cock at the entrance to your wet full pussy. Whether you do it deliberately or have a birth control failure I will be happy if you get pregnant. I am pro-choice, so all decisions on whether to have a baby are entirely yours.
I believe in spontaneity so after agreeing to have sex the first time, you don't have to ask to start things next time, however "Stop" and "Not Right Now" are valid! Also valid is "OMG, This team meeting is so much better with you playing with my cock!" 😈
I'm not a great believer in sexual extremes, but have no objection to fun. I will mainly be turned on by the fact that someone beautiful is happy to be with me. I
​
^{Due to the prevalence of people who are just looking for fun {fine 👍} or fake 👎, I apologise to those who are seriously interested in that I will have to continue looking until I am in a committed physical relationship with someone!}

Checklist of Hidden Preferences
​
Spanking
Double Penetration
Slave Fantasy
Golden Showers
Degradation
Humiliation
Praise
Latex
Bondage (rope)
Bondage (harness)
Bondage (apparatus - table / chair / cross)
Group Sex
Exhibitionism (being watched)
Anal Sex
Dirty Talk (specific trigger words - slut/whore/explicit acts described in detail)
Cum Play (facials / Ahegao)
Escort Fantasy
Mutual Masturbation
Nipple Play
Anal Play (Beads / plugs / licking the anus / having your anus licked)
Gang Bang (3+ partners at once)
Being recorded
Consentual Non-Consent (rape fantasy)
Choking
Ball Gag
Collar
Masks/Blindfolds
Glory Hole
Whipping
Fuck Toy fantasy
Big Cock
Fake Tits
Tape in an X over nipples
Edging / Orgasm Control
Threesome (FFM or MMF or both)
Oral Sex
Anonymous Sex
Bimbo Fantasy
Daddy Play
Toys
Visual Stimulus (Porn / Slideshow)
Restraints
Pain
Discipline
Service
Spit
Domination
Submission
Being Held
Role Play
Voyeurism (watching others)
Hoisery (lingere / tights / thigh high nylons / pantyhose)
Aurilism (Moaning / ASMR stimulation)
Music
Stimulants - cocaine / alcohol / thc / MDMA / Mushrooms
Wax Play
Homosexuality
Tan Lines
Feet

I don’t know how to. He has an addiction to women online. He has lied about who he was the entire relationship and has projected onto me and turned me into a bad guy in his world. It’s time to break up and we both know but nobody will make a move. We have a house together, pets, planned vacations, but I can’t be with a man who has betrayed me and betrays me nightly with his phone. There’s lies after lies as to why he’s on his phone in the bathroom for 45mins nightly before showering. He says he’s reading but reading what? I found porn stars and only fans models on his ig following, I found out he was talking to a girl online our entire relationship, I found out through another man that he was using my photos on a fake tinder that he made saying we’re looking for a threesome with another man, he won’t take photos with me on my terms but occasionally will ask for a photo with me on his terms and I’m terrified he’s uploading our intimate stuff somewhere.
I can’t do this anymore I’m at my breaking point but I cannot bring myself to leave. I told myself I will tomorrow but I don’t know if I can. It’s been 5 yrs with an unavailable man. I’m so lonely even though I spend every single day with him. For the past 4 months we’ve only had sex like once a month, he doesn’t look at my body in admiration anymore and he’s been trying stuff that you see in porn when we do have sex.
The thing is, there’s no talking about it he will deny anything I “accuse” him of til the day he dies. I’ve had a gut feeling for a while now that he has a secret life online.
My ex hurt me just as bad, maybe even worse. I am one of the most loyal humans and stayed with these men even after finding out they cheated and didn’t get revenge. Im a soft and sensitive soul and I don’t want to hurt anyone ever. Cheating is the ultimate betrayal. I’ve spent my whole life wanting this fairytale love but I don’t think it exists. I am now in a mental state of believing every man is addicted to porn and doesn’t see women as anything other than sexual beings. Maybe that’s just their biology and something I’ll forever have to live with. I will never trust a man again.
Then, I start to get mad at these women who put out this content. It feels as if they’re part of the problem. I don’t want to shame any women bc I know they’re just trying to make a living but I’ve been destroyed by cheating men and naked women on the internet.
Im sorry to whoever’s reading this, I know it’s a mess but I just word vomited onto my phone. If anyone has any words of comfort, advice or different perspectives please share. I have a feeling I won’t be able to do it tomorrow bc he’ll come up with some bullshit excuse and I’ll believe it just for the sake of not having to go through a breakup.

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Although I’m working my way out of this situation with this narcissistic porn addicted cre*tin my patience is wearing so thin, I’m on the verge of explosion.
He watches a lot of porn, he’s obsessed with it to the point he thinks anything less than these surgically enhanced, fake edited bimbos is unworthy of him. Ie me. He’s 53, greying in a load of debt, hes fat, he’s had 2 wives previous, hes still left with one and she’s a bigger manipulative narcissist than he is, her favorite game is weaponisijg his kid against him for her every want because she has some sort of warped entitlement issue. im the 3rd on the way to leaving for a better life eventually.
But he looks at me like I’m scum, I’m 28, look a lot younger for my age, im 96ibs, toned European build. I will admit I look tired and exhausted right now because I’m done with it all. But he didn’t understand I have a lifetime ahead of me. He wants me to have sex, but then he’s says stupid sh+t like I’m his possession, I don’t really have emotions or a future no matter how hard I work is really going to turn me on. Even the vision of him, wanking to porn which he does openly regardless of me around or not makes me feel physically sick.
I wouldn’t say I’m a 10, but can do a lot better than this little coward. Many men, have shown how desirable I am to him through actions. But I’m not a porn star, so I’m am inadequate to him.
I’m really really really biting my f*** tongue to tell him how worthless he is in this world. My patience is wearing so thin. I don’t know what he thinks he deserves in his fantasy’s. But he ain’t ever going to get it in real life. It’s not even a few bullshit words from a scorned woman as I am. It’s his failed marriages, it’s the type of woman he cheats with, it’s the woman he tries to flirt with in public that are completely repulsed by him, me added to that list now. It’s his disgusting disrespect of a woman like me who moved my whole entire life for him (from Uk to us near more 10,000 miles away) to which he doesn’t acknowledge. It’s this ugly worthless bitch (which he is trying to convince me of, half succumbing, half seeing the logic of his failed ways, that will hopefully survive him into death, when I’ve long gone) that saved him from drowning ( which he doesn’t acknowledge). He just blamed me for not getting him out quick enough to the point he thought he had brain damage. However, I pulled him out using the buoyancy of the water and couldn’t lift him for air, and had to scream 3 times to get people to help me. He can’t realise no one else cares about him like I did. His ex wife, definitely wouldn’t have done it the first though in her mind would have been her payout. After that, I was tramautised for a while and he left on his jolly holidays two days later with his son while berating me that I left him to drown, that I seriously damaged his intellect for life and it’s all my fault he’s thinking slower.
I’m beginning to slowly lose it. Just give me some advice to save me from this lunacy.
The curtains have dropped. His bullshit is as transparent as looking through a window. I never lost my mental reasoning within this relationship, only my emotional trust and that for him, even anything like him, repulses and disgusts me.
How do I navigate this, when the curtains have finally dropped but there’s nothing but rage and anger and impatience.

I'll admit it I watch porn. Sometimes it feels like too much. I don't feel like it's morally wrong or anything I'm just wondering if it's good. There are articles and TED talks stating the negative effects of porn and they may well be right. I do much prefer amateur to the over produced professional porn with the fake moans and fake orgasms. I'm 43 so porn as we know it now, available on your phone as much as you want, wasn't available. I had to go through a beaded curtain in the back of a video store. If I had a 13 year old son I probably wouldn't want him watching porn. Some people even think it's cheating to watch porn if you're in a relationship which I think is crazy. Sometimes it feels like I'm eating junk food if I watch too much. But it's not easy to stop either. I could be addicted not sure.